Saturday, February 19, 2011

Release Me Part II

We saw The Monsignor this afternoon to finalize the details of the ceremony. He gave us a book called "Celebrating Our Love - Liturgical Resources for Preparing and Celebrating Marriage", which has a variety of selections of prayers, scripture readings, psalms and acclamations. It's like a choose-your-own adventure book. He told us to take it home, make our selections and then email him with our choices.

We chatted for a bit when he asked, "Have I given you a copy of this?" as he pulled out a single sheet of paper from the file folder on his desk. I shook my head no.

He handed me a copy and I just put it to the side as we continued our chat.

We talked mostly about the ceremony and how we can make it personal to us by the selection of readings and the music. And of course The Comedian used this opportunity to chat with The Monsignor cousin to cousin. So over all it was quite a pleasant meeting.

The last bit of business was making sure we apply for our marriage license a month or so before the ceremony and getting a copy of The Comedian's baptismal certificate to be added to our record.

When we got home, I pulled out the page The Monsignor had given me.

I laughed soooooooo hard reading this! I know this is all very serious business in the Church, but come on! I "violated" canonical form?! My "attempted" marriage?! Hahahahahahahaaaaa!!

I hope God forgives me for thinking this letter is totally hilarious. But if this is what it takes for me to marry The Comedian, so be it.

Sunday, February 13, 2011


I had my second birthday party yesterday. And its success was a direct result of a gift I got from the first birthday party I had last Saturday.

Having a birthday that fell on a Tuesday gave me full license to have two parties this year. The first one was a family thing in the afternoon. We had drinks and snacks and cake and presents! I got a gift certificate to from my brother and his fiancee, Season 1 Vol 2 of Glee from my soon-to-be-mother-in-law, and a lovely sweater from my soon-to-be-sister-in-law. But by far, the best present I received was from my darling true love, The Comedian. He got me The Magic Bullet.

Yes folks, THE MAGIC BULLET!!!!

I'm sure some of you are scratching your heads wondering why I would love a kitchen appliance more than my Glee DVDs.

Well, the gifting of the Magic Bullet was The Comedian's way of righting a wrong my ex-husband had committed back in 2006.

A little back story if you will....

I'm insanely addicted to infomercials. My absolute favourite is the one for The Magic Bullet. Back when I was still with that douche bag I called a first husband, I would distract myself from the misery of my marriage by watching The Magic Bullet infomercial at all hours of the day and night. Eventually, everytime we would be out shopping, I would bring up how awesome it would be if I had a Magic Bullet.

One weekend we were at the Pickering Flea Market. We walked up and down every aisle in the place. He was busy spending my money on stuff he liked, as per usual. We turned a corner when lo and behold, there was a display with The Magic Bullet in all its glory.

I ran up to it and practically hugged it. I wept tears of joy, I was so excited to finally see one in the flesh. I noticed the price tag - $50! HALF THE PRICE OF BUYING IT ON TV!!


And still to this day, I can't figure out how he talked me out of it. He managed to talk me out of spending MY money (for those of you new to this blog, he was jobless for most of our marriage) on something that I DREAMED about. He told me he would come back and get it for me at a later date.


So a later date rolls around and he comes home with a big box. I got super excited because I knew what was in the box!! I dropped to my knees on the living room floor and tore into that box and found...

The Blender 2000.

W.T.F?! The Blender 2000? A knock off of my majestic Magic Bullet.

"It's not The Magic Bullet!" I wailed.

"It's the same thing! It has all the same parts and it was ten dollars cheaper!"


"It does exactly the same thing. Come on, let's try it out."

I took it into the kitchen, read the manual from start to finish, set it all up as per the instructions, and then attempted to make the thing I've been dreaming about - creamy smooth nacho cheese.

On the infomercial, they throw a block of cheese into The Magic Bullet, turn it on and it blends that block down into a creamy dreamy cup of velvet love. Then they pop it into the microwave for a few seconds to heat it up, pour it on to the nacho chips and voila! The perfect party snack.

So I took my block of old cheddar, threw it into the Blender 2000 and started it up.

Literally three seconds into it the motor burned out and caught fire!


He tried to protest but I threw a huge tantrum and made him understand that in no uncertain terms, he was to take that piece of shit back to the asshole who sold it to him and get every last penny back.

So he went the next day and got the money back, and then came home with a bunch of Star Wars toys instead.

So my dreams of The Magic Bullet were totally obliterated and I never spoke of it to him again.

....End of back story.

Fast forward to a typical Sunday morning sometime between August and two weeks ago. The Comedian and I are in bed, all snuggled up together talking. We do a lot of talking on Sunday mornings, so at some point along the way, I must have told him about my longings for a real Magic Bullet.

So being the absolutely amazing man that he is, he tucked that story into his brain and when he was out shopping for my birthday gifts, he bought me my personal Holy Grail - the honest to goodness, 100% real, often imitated but never duplicated, MAGIC BULLET!!!

Here's the reaction shot of when I opened it. See? I'm TOTALLY EXCITED!

Anyway, my party yesterday would mark a very important time for me. It was my first birthday with The Comedian, the first one in my new house, and the first birthday in a very long time where my BFFs would be able to attend. I wanted to do something super special. I decided to make the appetizers for my guests.

For those of you who know me in real life, you KNOW how big a deal this is. And for those of you who don't know me, let me summarize - I don't know how to cook, and I've never had the inclination to cook, EVER.

The Magic Bullet has more magic powers than anyone could have ever anticipated.

I made hummus dip served with warm pita bread and two dozen stuffed mushrooms. I was going to make garlic bread but I got nervous about how much I could handle and I just bought that premade instead.

And let me just say, all my appetizers were gobbled up mere moments after I put them out. Blondo was so incredibly proud of me, she couldn't stop smiling and declaring how GOOD everything tasted.

I was extremely proud of myself. Making those appetizers was definitely a turning point, not only in the development of my party hosting skills, but in my life.

And here is the proof!

I still can't find the right words to thank The Comedian for making my birthday absolutely magical.

I'm a very, very lucky girl. :D

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Super Fun Birthday Times

My birthday yesterday was totally awesome. From morning till night, it was super duper wicked AWESOME!

First, the sun was shining brightly! It's been weeks and weeks of cold and overcast. But yesterday morning, there shone a light so bright!

My commute into work was great. The traffic wasn't as ridiculous as usual so I actually got to work on time.

I was taken out to lunch by a good friend, and it was super delicious! It was a design-your-own thai noodle house that I've never been to.

After lunch, I realized I had to renew both my driver's license, and the sticker for my plates. I headed off to a Service Ontario location close to my office.

By my approximation, the entire city of Toronto was waiting to apply/renew/request something. I sent a text to my coworker to let her know that it may take me a bit longer to get back to the office. I walked up to reception, announced I was there to renew my license, and they gave me a number A927.

I watched the numbers coming up on the display boards and it seems as though they were running series A, B, C, D, F, R, S, & T. Gaaaaaaah. I settled in for what could become an ordeal lasting the entire afternoon.

I decided I should comb my hair and put on some lip gloss in preparation for my new driver's license picture. No sooner had I finished putting my brush away, my number suddenly started blinking on the display board!


I marched up to counter #6, handed the clerk my old license, paid my $75, got my picture snapped and was handed my temporary paper license until my new one comes in.


I was so happy I stopped in at Tim Hortons to get myself a celebratory steeped tea. I took the subway back to the office and slipped back to my desk before anyone really noticed I had been gone.

About an hour later, I was doing a quick Facebook check and in my feed was an update from the Glee fan page. The cast was going on another North American tour this summer. But this time around, they are making a stop in TORONTO!!!! OH EHM GEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!! And tickets would be on sale next week! DOUBLE OH EHM GEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!

I think I actually let out an audible squeal. :D

The rest of the afternoon flew by and before I knew it, I was on the bus headed home. The Comedian was waiting for me at the bus station. He whisked me away to a restaurant for my birthday dinner.

He hadn't revealed our final location as he wanted it to be a surprise.

We pulled into the parking lot of our local Jack Astors, home to a super snazzy Elvis booth which he had reserved for us! YAY!!!!

We ordered these huge fruity yummy drinks, had appetizers, good entrees, and we talked and laughed and laughed some more. The waiters came out with cake for me at the end of our meal and made me stand up and sing "I'm a Little Tea Pot" at the top of my lungs. LOVED IT!!!

On the way home I phoned my Dad to say hi and thank him for giving me half my genetic make up. :)

Once we got home, we watched the new episode of Glee, after which I happily drifted off to sleep.

This was definitely one of the best birthdays ever.

Thirty-six is off to a fabulous start!

Friday, February 4, 2011

Next Category

My birthday is next week. WOOT!

I remember moments last year in the week leading up to my birthday that sucked, that were awesome, and that were totally awesome.

I also remember getting the best piece of advice on turning 35. I have to admit, I was a bit bummed that night as for me, turning 35 represented crossing past the point of no return with regards to getting married and having babies.

And now I'm just a few days away from turning 36. Again, I am astonished at what a difference a year makes.

The only thing that has sucked was having to chose the next category of age range when signing up for WagJag today. I'm in the 36 - 40 category now. So long 31 - 35! You were a blast.

But other than that, I am still living it and loving it!