Do Over

Sometimes I do things because I want to illicit a reaction. But being the self-loathing person I am, I never really believe that anyone gives a shit about me or my feelings. So I end up doing things where I hope I get a reaction, but don't believe I actually will get a reaction, and then when I do get a reaction, I get upset I ever did the thing that got the reaction in the first place. Get it?

Sooooo, I took to a public forum to express my distaste for the fact that Funny Guy has YET TO PHONE ME since our beer-bombing.

Yeah, I kinda referenced it on my Facebook status. Now I'm not foolish enough to come right out and say, "Paprika is mad because Funny Guy fucked her and didn't call". Of course I've got a little more tact than that. However, it was a pointed status update.

"Paprika really wants a do over for March 8th."

A bunch of friends left comments to the effect of "Aww, you ok?", or "HUGS!" or "Should I even ask what happened?"

One of my friends said she wanted a do over for the last 37 years of her life (which reminds me I will have to phone her today and tell her she is FABULOUS and not to change a thing!) and at the end of which she said, "...and have a beer."

To which I responded, "I think beer is what got me in trouble in the first place."

Now seeing as my status update had been up the whole day, I didn't think that Funny Guy would 1. see it, or 2. comment on it.

Yeah. Did I mention how surprised I am when I get a reaction?

He left this comment on my page 5 hours ago, so that would be around 3am.

"Why u so hard on March 8th? Strictly speaking I've been out of town a lot since then so I don't know what the rest of the month has been like but yo march 8th was a monday it already has baggage, go easy."

AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

So I did what any sassy single female who wants more sex would do. I flew into damage control mode and sent him an email.

From: Paprika
To: Funny Guy
Date: Wed, Mar 24, 2010 at 7:55 AM
Subject: Dude

Hey,

I saw your comment on my FB status. I think you misread my status, or I'm misreading your comment.

I want a do over from March 8th because I dumped plans with a friend to go hang with you. Which is why beer got me into trouble. She's still a little mad at me but I think she'll get over it once our schedules sync up again. It's just annoying to hear, "But weeeee haaaaaaad plaaaaaaaannnnsss...." I'm like, it was 2 weeks ago, get over it.

I don't want a do over from what happened after the beer. I think that would be classified as, I want a do-more! LOL

Anyway, that'll teach me to post cryptic messages in a public forum.

Hope the road to and from out of town has treated you well.

Paprika

So basically what I've done is:

1. Lied.

2. Stroked his ego.

3. Lied.

And to make it all that much more believable, I employed the help of Beaner to further perpetuate this little white lie, by having her post as the jilted friend on the same status comment thread.

I suppose I should just take my own advice about all this and get over it, it was two weeks ago. But I'm hurt. I'm hurt that someone I call friend can so easily use me.

As I mentioned before, I know we're not going to fall in love and get married or any crap like that. But the minimum expectation is that he ACKNOWLEDGES me. That's it. A simple phone call to say hi would have averted all the hurt I'm feeling right now.

At least I know what a good friend I have in Beaner. She totally had my back without any questions. (Does it make sense to you now? You're the best. Sorry for bombing your cell with so many calls.)